Tag Archives: life coaching

What Are You Going to Choose?

9 Jun

Do you ever feel like you’re a deflating balloon? Not a slow deflate, but a just-let-go-of-a-fully-blown-balloon-spinning-out-of-control-and-helplessly-flailing-about sort of deflating balloon? Yeah, me too. But there is one key word that simply isn’t true: we aren’t helpless.

 

I tend to forget that. Maybe you do too. It is so easy to let the negative self talk win. It is so easy to believe we aren’t good enough, that we have nothing valuable to share. In fact, I just spent this entire last week binge watching three Jane Austin movies and feeling sick to my stomach because I’m so afraid to fail at something I really want to do. Something I really believe in.

 

It is scary to put ourselves out there… but far scarier to never try. And the thought of never trying and therefore never knowing terrifies me.

 

We have a say in our life. We have every right to feel deflated, upset, scared, disappointed, angry… and we have every right to feel excited, joyful, loving and happy.

 

So, what are you going to choose? Are you going to helplessly flail about as though you have no choice? Or are you going to acknowledge you’re deflating, give your balloon a few deep breaths and enjoy floating among the stars?

 

I would love to hear from you in the comments below. What helps or inspires you to keep moving forward during times of self-doubt?

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Let Go… and Make Room for More!

21 Apr
Good-bye Fancy Pants

Good-bye Fancy Pants

Confession time. I have been holding on to a pair of jeans for far too long that are far too small for me. It’s like watching a Great Dane trying to fit into a Chihuahua’s sweater–it ain’t happening! And my reasoning for holding onto these jeans is even sillier: I don’t want to get rid of them because I invested a lot of money in them… and I dread shopping for jeans. Please join me in playing my tiny violin. Thankfully I called myself out on my own BS and will bequeath them to another fashionable soul because my booty cannot squeeze into them… nor do I want it to…

 

I purchased those jeans after I lost quite a bit of weight (gluten intolerance and adrenal fatigue suck) due to a stressful chapter in my life. That chapter is finished and so are these jeans.

 

It can be scary to let go, to admit that something or someone isn’t working for us. When we let go of negative energy, we free ourselves to receive so many positive blessings. We literally make room for opportunities we want to attract. Every Fall and Spring when I go through my entire apartment one room at a time and clear out everything I don’t need, I end up attracting new clients, have a surge of creative ideas and have more time and energy for the people and hobbies I love. True story.

 

What are you holding on to? What clothing, appliances, relationships, furniture, food, thoughts are holding you back from moving forward and reaching your goals? What is one action step you can take today to let go and make room for more?

Ch-Ch-Changes!

24 Mar
Photo courtesy of thecaregiverspace.org

Photo courtesy of thecaregiverspace.org

Ahhh, puberty. Remember it? As if learning to wear deodorant and operating a water pick to clean between our braces wasn’t hard enough, we also had to navigate hairy armpits and menstrual cycles as a girl, or a squeaky voice and vivid dreams as a boy. One thing is for sure, we were all painfully awkward for a relatively short period of time for a very good reason. That confusing experience literally made us the men and women we are today… and the same is true about all worthwhile changes.

So when we want to stop exercising and eating well because…
It’s hard
I don’t have the time
It’s boring

or when we want to give up on obtaining our dream job because…
The path is too hard
I’m not good enough
I don’t have enough money

or when we keep putting off being in a loving relationship because…
I don’t deserve it
I need to be thin first
All the good ones are taken

Just remember puberty. Remember how painfully awkward it was… then smile, laugh. Because all worthwhile changes are awkward at first, but then you get through it, and the universe on the other side is better than you could have ever imagined.

“When I lose weight, I will…”

29 Sep
Marianne Williamson

Marianne Williamson

Have you ever said, “When I lose weight, I will…”

  • ask for a raise
  • leave my unhealthy relationship
  • buy new clothes
  • socialize more

Or maybe you’ve said, “When I have more money, I will…”

  • join a gym
  • eat healthier
  • travel more
  • pursue my dream job

Whatever it is, we’ve all said the “When I’m…” statements before. We think there is something wrong with our physical being (not attractive enough, not thin enough, not wealthy enough) or our mental and emotional being (not smart enough, not talented enough). We believe we need to be a photoshopped version of ourselves to achieve happiness. Well, that is just a brown paper bag of poo set ablaze and left at our feet by the negative voice in our head.

We aren’t that voice.

I use to think that if I was prettier, smarter, wealthier, life would be better. I’d travel more, meet a wonderful man, pursue my dream job and have a life full of butterfly-colored unicorns dancing on rainbows. I finally realized the list I made about all the things I’d do if I were prettier, smarter or had more money was the root to my happiness. If I wanted to pursue my dream job, then I better start doing what I love and if I wanted to be in a loving relationship with an amazing man, I better get off my couch and get out there. I finally realized that waiting to be those things was costing me those exact things I wanted—it was costing me happiness NOW. And what if (*gasp*) I already was enough? How freeing would it be to believe you are enough?

Guess what my hot-to-trot friend? You are enough. We all are. It’s time for all of us to re-write our message and kick that negative Nancy or Ned out of our head. What is more true: (1) Losing weight will turn your significant other into the person of your dreams who treats you with love and kindness or (2) Leaving your unhealthy relationship will free you to meet other people who bring joy and support to your life so you find yourself stressing less, choosing to treat yourself better and the pounds begin to fall off? I encourage you to insert your own personal scenario into that statement. Change is difficult and it’s okay to be scared of the unknown. It’s okay to have real, human feelings. But realize this, you have the choice to change your life and be happy NOW. You don’t have to wait to live. What if you asked for that raise you deserve? You joined that gym? You decided you’d rather be single and happy than dating and miserable? Ooooh!!! I get goosebumps just thinking about all of the amazing talents you bring to the world and the joy you can create for yourself if you choose to believe and take action. I know from experience that the first step always takes the most courage, but it offers the most growth as well.

So, what’s buzzing in that beautiful brain of yours? What is it costing you to hold on to things/relationships that bring unhappiness? How is it serving you? What is one thing you can do to step into your happiness? I ask you these questions, because these are the questions I needed to answer myself… and it ain’t always pretty. My rock bottom was illness and a controlling environment… and while the journey isn’t always easy, the opportunity to reinvent yourself and step into happiness is worth it. Is that a butterfly-colored unicorn salsa dancing on a rainbow? Yes. Yes it is.

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